Why I Deleted the Facebook App (And Why You Probably Should Too)

Interesting take on social media. And what it is taking from you and your family.
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I love my smart phone. I love having my personal assistant (Siri), my calendar, to do lists, shopping lists and budget all at my fingertips. I helps so much with our personal day to day lives. But, I know personally, I spend a lot of time on my phone, and not in the most useful ways.

I used to spend a large amount of time on Facebook. Then along came it's best friends Pinterest and Instagram. And my social media time was increased when I became a blogger. Trying to keep up with the latest news to share, pinning all of my blogging buddies, finding ideas for blog posts, sharing Instagram photos and practicing my photography. I loved all of these so much, that I forgot about my number 1 job. Being a mom.

It was easy in the young infant days to spend hours on Facebook and Pinterest. While the baby slept on me for the 3rd nap of the day, I would bring my phone in and scroll away. Well, this habit didn't die. It continued and actually got worse. As my daughter grew, I was always trying to be the person who posted photos and videos, bragged about what she was able to do now and how much I was a 'supermom' in a not so humble way, and I realized I was missing out on so much - and not such a 'supermom'.

So, I deleted social media from my phone. I actually did it. More as an experiment, but I got so much more back.
When I disconnected myself from the World, I got more connected with myself and my family. (Click to Tweet)

What I did instead of being on Facebook and other Social Media:

  1. I focused on my home. I was able to be present in the moment. I started to find out all of the things in my house that wasn't working, needed to be organized or what actually was working. I was focusing more time into how our routines worked rather than how other people's routines might work for our home. I was able to get more cleaning done, more cooking done and more organizing done. 
  2. I focused on playing. One thing I have discovered is that my daughter LOVES to be outside. If she could be outside running around, going down a slide or just blowing bubbles, her life is complete. I missed watching her so much because I was taking a photo and posting to Instagram or checking in at the park on Facebook. I wanted to see how many people 'liked' what I was doing, instead of going and enjoying it myself.
  3. I focused on teaching. I had been doing a good job of teaching my daughter sign language, but about 6 months ago, it began to wane. And it wasn't her fault. It was mine. Instead of taking the time to look up some signs or some simple games, I was spending time just pinning things on Pinterest and not actually doing them. Now, I use my phone to simply look up a word we want to work on, a video that is about letters she wants to watch or a simple educational game app that she wants to play. And we do it together. 
  4. I focused on learning. I am new to a lot in the blogging world. I am new to parenting. I am still a baby in the marriage world. Social media is great for learning about new tips, techniques and skills in these categories, but I never actually took the time to read them. Now I carve out time to educate myself instead of just reading the statuses of the day and making them news and educational. 
  5. I focused on being happy. I loved being able to share my happy moments on social media and seeing all the great things that were happening in my friend's lives, but I was seeing a lot of other stuff too. I was seeing opinions and advice that were negative or not encouraging. I was seeing other people's husbands treating them better than I thought I was being treated. I was seeing other people's kids being better behaved than I thought my child was behaving. I saw kids who were advancing much faster than I thought my daughter was. So I started to change my ways, and not for the better. I was more nit-picky to my husband and more agitated. I started to push my daughter to do things she may not have been developmentally ready for. I turned into a person I didn't like.

    When I turned off the social media, I started to look at my situation. I started to be more grateful that my husband does the dishes instead of bringing me home lavish amounts of flowers. Or so thankful that my daughter loves to color and wants me to sit with her and color too. Taking away the negativity started to make me feel more grateful.
Don't get me wrong. I still use social media. I love Pinterest for great ideas, I love sharing on Facebook my happy moments and I take photos all day, but wait until after bedtime to post to Instagram. I'm still figuring out Twitter. And I haven't even delved into Periscope.

It may seem that I am posting for my blog all day long. And I am. But it's either scheduled or during naps and periodically (scheduled times) throughout the day.  I love being able to interact with my followers, but unfortunately, it isn't my priority throughout the day right now. My family is. And that is how it should be for every one of you. 

This all started as taking a break from social media. To see what life would be like not being 'connected'. What I got out of this was something totally different than what I expected. I got something so much better than I expected. When I disconnected myself from the World, I got more connected with myself and my family.

My challenge to you is to try and go without for a day, a week or a month. Delete the apps off your phone, block the websites from your computer at work. Try to look up from your phone and focus on the life you have in front of you. You may be surprised at what you find. 
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26 comments

  1. Thanks Steph! Encouraging, humbling and truthful.

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  2. Great post. More people should try this! Family is far more important than always being connected!

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    1. Thanks.It really is. And I didn't realize how much time I spent on my phone until it wasn't there anymore.

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    2. thank u so much for this post..!

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  3. I am really considering this. On one hand I love seeing my friends messages and pictures while waiting at dr's offices or waiting in line places. On the other hand, it is extremely distracting and I have a house to run, my career to pursue, and two blogs to do. More importantly, I have a baby to play with.

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    1. When I find myself in a doctor's office or have a spare minute, I tend to go on Facebook in the Chrome browser. I still have access to it, but it is not as user friendly so I don't spend nearly as much time online as I would in the app.

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  4. I took my FB off my phone for quite a while and loved it that way. Then I started slowly sneaking on again via my browser app. Then I had surgery and was bedridden so I put it back on and haven't taken it off again. It truly is a time sucker!

    PS Even though I sometimes snuck on with the browser, it isn't easy on mobile, so it kept me from wasting as much time as I do with the app!

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    1. I agree - that is what I do. I use the browser but def not as easy to use. So when I do get on Facebook on my phone that is what I use. And I do agree, when you are stuck in bed sick or something else, I do think having the app would be better because you can't really do anything else. But I would take it off again. I find I am more productive!

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  5. I seriously need to do this. It drives me crazy the way everyone (including me) has their head constantly buried in a screen, but then I get one in front of me and the vicious cycle starts again.

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    1. Absolutely! I started to notice I did it more when my 19 mo old daughter wanted to have the screen in front of her face. It's eye opening when you see it happening in front of you.

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  6. Truly good words to read...especially when you know that your kids will mimic your behavior. Glad you've discovered balance.

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    1. Thanks! My hope is that others can too.

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  7. Thank you for the read! I 100% agree with you! I posted this quote on instagram the other day: "Comparison is the thief of joy" - Theodore Roosevelt

    Running With Infertility

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    1. I love that quote! I have been starting to live by that quote daily. Reminding myself that my home and my family need to be good enough for me..not anyone else.

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  8. Gosh - so hard to read about young mothers struggling with these social media issues. Don't know how I might have handled it back in the day, but so grateful not to have had the distractions you ladies do. My boys are now 24 and 20, and although they've grown up with access to social media, computers, etc., I think they have a good balance going. In our home, sadly, it's my 66 year old husband who has become super addicted (he has F.B. account while I do not) and sits with his face in his phone morning, noon, and night. He has always loved 'new toys' and this one is just that for him, so I'm trying to wait it out I guess. Meanwhile, I keep doing as I've always done: run my home, teach piano, enjoy long visits with my friends, garden, and read lots of great books. Please keep your lives full with real interactions ladies.

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    1. Thank you so much for your insight. It is so tough these days for us young mothers that's true, but who knows what our children will need to face in the future. It is so tough when someone else is the one who needs the 'social media intervention' but you seem to have a great attitude about it. Keep on going! You are an inspiration to us :)

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  9. I have felt the need to unplug as well for most of the reasons you state. I have 4 LO's and we're starting to homeschool this week. Feel like I waste so much time on technology instead of living in the moment. I have also seen this become a major issue for my spouse as he too neglects the family as he is too busy going thru his news feed.
    This was just what i needed today and am deleting these apps on my phone now. Love my Pinterest but will just take the time at the end of the day to do some browsing on my computer.

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  10. i very much agree, i find i waste so much time on social media and it really frustrates me when people around me are so absorbed into their phones.

    However, thought it was highly ironic that you have a direct link to tweet.....and to pin to read later.....

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    1. I'm sorry you misinterpreted my additions to the post. I like to share to pinterest, facebook or twitter so that I can find those things later when I have time. Thanks for the comment and I am glad you enjoyed the article.

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  11. This is perfect !!! I deactivated my account two weeks ago . I am amazed at the amount of time I spent doing all of the same things that you said you were doing . I have cleaned and organized three rooms since then ! Thank you for the reminder that LIFE comes before anything else !!!

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  12. Agreed, did the same thing for same reasons. I am reading articles intead of statuses. I am learning alot of things, and my house is looking amazing. Way more intouch my my family. Also, i perfer visiting with my friends instead of just seeing what their up to online. I cant stand being around ppl with their faces buried in their phones, so i go on in morning or before bed, to read my emailed articles i subscribed to. Life is much better these days, no more comparing my life to others. Great article, thank you for sharing.

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  13. I love this. I have deleted all of my social apps too. And I haven't been on Facebook in a week. I logged on today just to take a peek and realized I missed nothing. So off again I went. I didn't scroll the newsfeed, look at other's timelines. I simply logged right back off. And it felt and feels so good. Like I'm free. Whoo hoo!

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  14. Awesome post! This is why I limit myself and only go on twice a day. Once in the morning once at night.

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  15. I absolutely agree with all your points,but the real cure is not to become addicted to social media in the first place. I use facebook as a tool to stay in touch with family and friends especially those tat don't live in the area or same timezone. It works, I use Pinterest for recipes, and other interests. I do not go on either everyday. That is on purpose. When we sit down to eat, all devices are turned off. So I actually think that the apps are a good thing, when used with restraint...

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    1. I agree - with restraint, they are a great thing! Some of us - don't have that great of self control. lol. We're working on it :)

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  16. I currently have a two month old son and reading this totally made me realize that I literally sit on my phone all day on Pinterest and other social media apps when I should be playing with him. I am a young mom and a newlywed so it is definitely new territory for me to have to take care of an infant and keep our home running smoothly. It is a lot of work but I do think if I put my phone down more often I would get a lot more accomplished and I wouldn't miss out on so many smiles and laughs that my son does all through the day. I really enjoyed this post.

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